So You Think You Want to be a Mommy?

Rebecka Vigus
Infinity Publishing (2005)
ISBN 0741426315
Reviewed by Kelli Glesige for Reader Views (2/06)

Some teens may have the false illusion that having a baby is a status symbol to be looked up to. At the time Rebecka Vigus, author of “So You Think Want to be a Mommy,” was doing her student teaching in 1986, she was shocked to see the young teen mothers dress up their babies and bring them to school.

“So You Think You Want to be a Mommy” was written for those thinking about having a baby and who are still in high school or just out of high school, parents of teens, school counselors, health care professionals, or those who work with teens. The book asks some very serious questions of the young potential mothers that need to be considered and answers provided for before becoming a mother. The author tells us time and time again that your life will change, and the future you may have planned will be altered. Having a child at a young age definitely places extra responsibilities on a teen, both emotionally and physically.

This eye opening book shares stories of those who have had children at a young age, their experiences, and how their lives have changed. Rebecka herself was a single mom with a child, and she wants others to know beforehand what single parenting is like. She asks questions for thought, such as, “So you think you want to be a mom, but does your boyfriend want to be a dad? Are you old enough to get married in your state? Is this the only thing that will keep you together?” A boyfriend in high school usually cannot earn enough money to support a wife and child. “How will you be supported? Can you finish school? Who will watch the child?” Daycare costs are quite expensive. “What is the daycare facility like? Is it a safe place for the child?”

Rebecka tries to warn of the potential consequences of pre-marital sex and the added stress when a young teen girl is single and pregnant. She also wants us to be aware of the possibility of STD’s and how these too can change our lives. Are the young girls trying to prove they are grown ups? Motherhood is a full-time 24/7 job that lasts a lifetime. The rewards come with the success of the child. The child is totally dependent. So many questions come up that need to be thoroughly thought out, and the answers are not easy.

The reader is shown several different scenarios of young ladies and their situations, each one looking at what life is like for the new young mother, the challenges and rewards, the tears and the laughs. Hopefully, young girls can gain insight from other women so that they get a true and accurate picture of what a young single mother may go through. Raising a child is a challenge that is especially so when the mother is so young and still growing up herself. Vigus states that most women who have babies without the benefit of marriage live beneath the poverty level along with their children. Is this what you want for yourself and your child?

Rebecka’s goal in writing this book is to help girls avoid getting themselves into some difficult and life changing circumstances concerning single motherhood. But, if you already find yourself in a situation and need help and advice, Vigus also offers some places to call for help. Her main purpose is to give so much foresight, that hopefully motherhood can be an event planned for after marriage when everyone should be more prepared!

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